I am blessed and honored. What a sweet day. I am worn out and full of more food than I have had in a long while. God, you are such a good friend. Gracias. :) I got to spend the morning with my mother and visit a lovely lady in Mt Sterling Ohio. We sat in a little country cafe with an angel room. Heard of a joyful woman's life of sickness and physical pain. How fitting was it that we were eating in "Joy"s restaurant! This lady has had so much illness and also heartache, in her life, and yet she has grown into a joyful woman. Next, me and mom drove back to Circleville and I met with a mother and daughter. Their family just lost everything they owned in a house fire not too long ago. They took ME out to Bob Evans and bought me lunch. We talked of the fire, of the ministry I'm apart of with Trafficked women and children and of the House of Prayer in Kansas City. What precious beautiful hearts they have! The mamma prayed for me with tears in her eyes after being moved with the Lords' heart for the enslaved ones. It was no coincidence that I met up with these ones today. I got home with a smile on my face. Sat down with mom and called homeowner insurance for my house and the bank. Long story short, I got a dispute/misunderstanding settled between them and my escrow and in the long run-my house payment will be significantly lower than estimated on June 1st!!! Praise God from whom all blessings FLOW!
I was ready to cash some checks and go pay for my mortgage payment right then when mom mentioned a family friend was in town and we should go see her. I ran to bank with my bro John and then over to the 3rd restaurant of the day. I only got an ice tea :) My mom and bro sat with me and our friend for awhile. Mom left and the 3 of us remained. Got to catch up and share some of my heart and hear her heart as well. My bro is a sweet guy letting me run everywhere with his truck this past week! Lord bless him. We were there for quite a while talking and then parted ways back to my parents house again. I then called my dear friend to see when we were going to meet up in Grove City. We arranged a time and I headed up to lovely Longhorn to see my sweet sweet friend who has a hope and a future. ;)
Time flew by talking to this one, who's name means love. I am so so honored and blessed by having this lady in my life. I know it was no accident that I stumbled through that Starbucks door on Stringtown rd several years ago. She taught me, candidly, how to spell the word "guys". For years I had been spelling it "guies", and when writing little notes to co-workers would include that word. Now I know how to spell that word thanks to her. :)I know that there will be joy and healing in the future for the lady named "Love". Wow, what a day, and what blessings. As the rain has fallen in abundance upon this Ohio soil, the Love of God has saturated my heart with His Blessings on my soul. Every one of them has a face and name. What treasures God has given to me today! :)
May the blessings of God rain down on YOUR heart today~
good night(buenos noches)
SQueen
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
Monday, May 16, 2011
Hope
So real Hope isn't a maybe kind of thing. It's a for real thing, a promise, and it's only a matter of time before it is received. I am clinging to the promise and hope that God is in control right now.
I came to Circleville, Ohio to do a support raising trip as a missionary from the International House of Prayer in Kansas City. I felt unprepared, I only partially did what I was taught in preparation, and I didn't have a whole lot of appointments.
I arrived and switched to a day schedule on the flight here. My body is still trying to adjust :) I was encouraged the next day to get some more appointments. I feel the battle I'm in though. In preparation for this trip and in being here, it has been a struggle for me to even want to pursue this.
Well, I press on ... a day later or so, I get a call that water is gushing in my basement at the house I own in Circleville. Sigh... Me and my brother Stephen go and manage to fix sub-pump and get water drained out. Pilot light wouldn't lite though in the hot water tank. We put some fans on got a plumber out to fix some broken pipes to water heater. $150 for a 15 min job that I found out today, he did wrong.
Got home, my phone wouldn't work. Next morning my lap top got a virus. Long story short, ph now works and lovely cousin Jay fixed my laptop. Today, several days after flooding in basement, I had to buy new water tank because old one still wouldn't lite.. $678 borrowed from my parents. I'm not completely discouraged, but I do see that I have spent more money than I've raised so far. I have a plane ticket for a mission trip this summer that I paid for with a credit card, in hopes of raising the money to pay it back on this trip to ohio. I still have a week left and God can do some good things. I am on the phone with Homeowners Ins and bank to settle a mix up in finances that has caused my house payment to go up steadily. I still haven't got it settled because of poor communication between bank and Ins. Sigh... :)
I have gotten one new supporter- Praise Jesus!! And I have met with some very sweet and amazing people. I know that fruit will come from this trip. Building relationships and telling people about human trafficking and what the Lord has put on my heart is a huge blessing in it self. So praise the Lord for people that want to hear me :) I am being obedient and saying yes. It is in the Lords hands what happens to my finances, my house, and my relationships. I commit my way to Him. "Lord here's my heart, take it all and leave nothing behind".. (song sung at ihop that I love.. :) I miss the prayer room and it's only been 6 days ..
I need help. In my weakness I am pursuing wholehearted obedience to Jesus. Any fruit or miracles that come from this trip, my house etc... it's all Him. Definitely not me! I fall short in many ways, but I have to keep believing that He will carry me through. God, I am in need of you. Please forgive my debt- I cast my cares before you. Please open up doors of opportunity and use me to share your heart with others. Jesus, I am yours- use me as you please and be glorified in my life.
Steph Q
ps, thank you to John, Stephen Mom and Dad for helping me financially and with lending me your vehicles and man power with my house. I love you each.
Steph
I came to Circleville, Ohio to do a support raising trip as a missionary from the International House of Prayer in Kansas City. I felt unprepared, I only partially did what I was taught in preparation, and I didn't have a whole lot of appointments.
I arrived and switched to a day schedule on the flight here. My body is still trying to adjust :) I was encouraged the next day to get some more appointments. I feel the battle I'm in though. In preparation for this trip and in being here, it has been a struggle for me to even want to pursue this.
Well, I press on ... a day later or so, I get a call that water is gushing in my basement at the house I own in Circleville. Sigh... Me and my brother Stephen go and manage to fix sub-pump and get water drained out. Pilot light wouldn't lite though in the hot water tank. We put some fans on got a plumber out to fix some broken pipes to water heater. $150 for a 15 min job that I found out today, he did wrong.
Got home, my phone wouldn't work. Next morning my lap top got a virus. Long story short, ph now works and lovely cousin Jay fixed my laptop. Today, several days after flooding in basement, I had to buy new water tank because old one still wouldn't lite.. $678 borrowed from my parents. I'm not completely discouraged, but I do see that I have spent more money than I've raised so far. I have a plane ticket for a mission trip this summer that I paid for with a credit card, in hopes of raising the money to pay it back on this trip to ohio. I still have a week left and God can do some good things. I am on the phone with Homeowners Ins and bank to settle a mix up in finances that has caused my house payment to go up steadily. I still haven't got it settled because of poor communication between bank and Ins. Sigh... :)
I have gotten one new supporter- Praise Jesus!! And I have met with some very sweet and amazing people. I know that fruit will come from this trip. Building relationships and telling people about human trafficking and what the Lord has put on my heart is a huge blessing in it self. So praise the Lord for people that want to hear me :) I am being obedient and saying yes. It is in the Lords hands what happens to my finances, my house, and my relationships. I commit my way to Him. "Lord here's my heart, take it all and leave nothing behind".. (song sung at ihop that I love.. :) I miss the prayer room and it's only been 6 days ..
I need help. In my weakness I am pursuing wholehearted obedience to Jesus. Any fruit or miracles that come from this trip, my house etc... it's all Him. Definitely not me! I fall short in many ways, but I have to keep believing that He will carry me through. God, I am in need of you. Please forgive my debt- I cast my cares before you. Please open up doors of opportunity and use me to share your heart with others. Jesus, I am yours- use me as you please and be glorified in my life.
Steph Q
ps, thank you to John, Stephen Mom and Dad for helping me financially and with lending me your vehicles and man power with my house. I love you each.
Steph
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
God is in the midst of her and she shall not be moved... Psalm 46
Though the earth give way, and everything trembles. God will be with us. Get ready Jesus is coming.... I had an intense dream last night to do with girls trapped in sex trade/being sexually exploited in a work place.. Still need to process. I will share one vivid picture in my dream. A girl in a wedding dress got shot in the back... Girls were getting murdered... I escaped. I woke up with a chorus "where can I go, where can I hide, who can I trust, Jesus save the Sparrows"... I felt fear and emotions that a girl must feel in that situation. To a very small degree, I'm sure. But what I did see and feel stuck with me all day.
The bride of Christ is being beaten, abused and murdered... so intense. The Boss that was the leader over it, he was full of so much rage and was calculatedly cruel... And there was a food-chain of abuse from those closest to the boss down to the ones that were distantly associated with him... distant from him for the moment anyway. It was only a matter of time. One by one girls were coming up dead, until a climatic event happened and there were people dying everywhere... Ambulances, lights, sirens... Jesus, help them right now. Jesus is our hope and theirs. God is in the midst of her and she shall not be moved.... wow, what does that look like?
When everything shakes and trembles around me, I must find my anchor in Jesus. My prayer is that I would be rooted and grounded in the love of Christ. Ephesians 3:16-19 and that I would have wisdom and revelation of Him Ephesians 1:17-19. Because circumstances, people and events will swirl around me- but God doesn't change. He alone remains, and He remains the same. We have to know Him, His nature, His heart and be established in His truth. The only truth. So that we won't be moved... Outwardly, I could get kidnapped, forced into prostitution, sold and raped over and over- no please... but say it were so... Will my heart remain unmoved from gazing into the firey, loving eyes of Jesus and confess with my mouth- "God is good"?? Our hope has to be in Him... I must fear the one who holds my heart, soul and very existence. God alone is to be feared and praised...
My hope can't be in whether I have bills paid, food in my belly, have a healthy body, and a husband who loves me. My hope can't be in a cute little house, with a white fence and a peaceful existence. Some trust in chariots, some trust in horses, but I trust in the name of the Lord... The Lord is my rock, refuge, hiding place in time of trouble, put your trust in God alone. He alone is your salvation... God give me (us) grace to set my gaze on you, the Holy, and be found watching and waiting with doves eyes for you.. Though you slay me, that I would trust you Lord. You give and take away, but Blessed be your name... God is good I say. And I will continue to pray for the "sparrows" that are falling, crying, dying... Jesus save them, & Jesus save their souls. ..
The bride of Christ is being beaten, abused and murdered... so intense. The Boss that was the leader over it, he was full of so much rage and was calculatedly cruel... And there was a food-chain of abuse from those closest to the boss down to the ones that were distantly associated with him... distant from him for the moment anyway. It was only a matter of time. One by one girls were coming up dead, until a climatic event happened and there were people dying everywhere... Ambulances, lights, sirens... Jesus, help them right now. Jesus is our hope and theirs. God is in the midst of her and she shall not be moved.... wow, what does that look like?
When everything shakes and trembles around me, I must find my anchor in Jesus. My prayer is that I would be rooted and grounded in the love of Christ. Ephesians 3:16-19 and that I would have wisdom and revelation of Him Ephesians 1:17-19. Because circumstances, people and events will swirl around me- but God doesn't change. He alone remains, and He remains the same. We have to know Him, His nature, His heart and be established in His truth. The only truth. So that we won't be moved... Outwardly, I could get kidnapped, forced into prostitution, sold and raped over and over- no please... but say it were so... Will my heart remain unmoved from gazing into the firey, loving eyes of Jesus and confess with my mouth- "God is good"?? Our hope has to be in Him... I must fear the one who holds my heart, soul and very existence. God alone is to be feared and praised...
My hope can't be in whether I have bills paid, food in my belly, have a healthy body, and a husband who loves me. My hope can't be in a cute little house, with a white fence and a peaceful existence. Some trust in chariots, some trust in horses, but I trust in the name of the Lord... The Lord is my rock, refuge, hiding place in time of trouble, put your trust in God alone. He alone is your salvation... God give me (us) grace to set my gaze on you, the Holy, and be found watching and waiting with doves eyes for you.. Though you slay me, that I would trust you Lord. You give and take away, but Blessed be your name... God is good I say. And I will continue to pray for the "sparrows" that are falling, crying, dying... Jesus save them, & Jesus save their souls. ..
Sunday, March 27, 2011
March Madness!
Wow, what a month it has been... Bank account in the red, got hired at a job I didn't want, contemplated indefinite singleness unto consecration to Jesus, talked/prayed with 6 prostitutes in freezing rain on a Troost street corner, was invited to Poland and Ukraine with Exodus Cry, and gave my number to a Mexican cook at work because he asked and I wasn't prepared.... ahrghh ;/ yikes. ..
on that note, the steak house is getting more tolerable, but my lack of world wisdom on guy/girl relationships are pretty much zero! I have been surrounded by safe ihop boys who you don't assume any intentions of them liking you unless they say flat out "I like you".. right, so if he doesn't say it, he doesn't like you... well, things are apparently different in the non-ihop planet and mr very nice Mexican cook at steakhouse asked me what I did on my night off, later asked if I had a cell phone, and abruptly asked for my number... I had not added up all those things to that point and was taken off guard and said, "sure".... no bueno. So, He said, I will text you tomorrow! oh boy, I felt the feeling of "yeah, he isn't just thinking of being friends".
Anyway, I told myself to not jump to assumptions and that maybe he was just being friendly. I got to my car later after my shift and He had texted me "Here's my number HONEY" .. hmmmm.. ok, so I told him I was only looking for friendship. Today, he texted and asked in broken english, to explain my text from yesterday. ... We were busy tonight and no time for texting. I did my best to keep my head above water with tables. ...
He came up to me and asked if I was coming to his house later... ahhh, "no" I said, "I'm going home". I managed to slip out without seeing him, but he texted to see what I was going to do. We texted back and forth for a few min until he asked when He was going to get to take me to dinner???? ok so he hasn't got the point through translation of Espanol and English and the fact that Stephanie has been isolated in a bubble for 4 years now. ...
I hurriedly texted my Guatemala friend to find out how to tell a guy I didn't want a boyfriend and only wanted a friend. I forwarded it to mr. steakhouse cook, and he replied Vamos something... apparently what he wrote was "let's try it"... no no no bueno. I was going to say no gracias, but roomie said no need to be nice, "Just say NO". So i did and he replied, "ok". And that was that.. tomorrow will hopefully be fine behind the line... sigh!!
The long and short of the rest of the month is: God is good. I am hopeful of the future and anticipate signs and wonders in the name of Jesus in my life. :) Surely His goodness and Mercy are following me these days in my life. Mrs E. gave me a counseling session on life, money and marriage basically. God rocked my heart two Tuesdays ago after we talked. I cried for 2 hours belly sobs in the pr. ... wow. Something happened (obviously right!) that night and has stayed changed in me since. Can't put a finger on it but I know this: God unearthed hidden pain that is still unidentifiable, and in the process a resounding understanding of His Goodness surrounded me and still does.
Though it was painful, I acknowledged and confessed with my mouth "Yes, to whatever you are doing Lord", and "God you are good". It was a painful, really sweet, surrender moment. I was limp with exhaustion and surrendered in laying all down. With a yes in my heart, I think something in me died that day, and it needed to die hard. :) So be it. Good stuff. From death comes life. I sense that life has begun. Tuesday (almost 2 weeks ago), things came to a head- a cross roads of sorts- and since that moment I feel like the ball has started rolling.... What ball? and Unto what exactly???
Dunno. But what I do know is that it is good. I have a feeling that come June/July some really cool things are going to be happening.. :) Poland And Ukraine in July is an answer to prayer. When I asked God 3 months ago where should I go what should I do, I heard Him say "wait for 6 months". 6 months happens to be June/July... So, I have found freedom in the past few weeks with the marriage thing and laying down interest, along with laying down lies I had agreed with. God is moving quickly. 2 prayers answered since Mrs E. Well, enough said for now.. :) Grace, peace and joy to your heart.
I bless the Lord for taking all of me and fixing my broken life. Muchos Gracias Jesus! ps. God has uncovered how I have become selfish in the areas of finances meaning- I have been on the receiving end for awhile now and it's time I give sacrificially again. So I have been :) Give much, love much, grow much... Seek first His Kingdom. It will know no end. The flowers fade and the grass withers away but the Word of the Lord and His Kingdom endure forever.
Queen
on that note, the steak house is getting more tolerable, but my lack of world wisdom on guy/girl relationships are pretty much zero! I have been surrounded by safe ihop boys who you don't assume any intentions of them liking you unless they say flat out "I like you".. right, so if he doesn't say it, he doesn't like you... well, things are apparently different in the non-ihop planet and mr very nice Mexican cook at steakhouse asked me what I did on my night off, later asked if I had a cell phone, and abruptly asked for my number... I had not added up all those things to that point and was taken off guard and said, "sure".... no bueno. So, He said, I will text you tomorrow! oh boy, I felt the feeling of "yeah, he isn't just thinking of being friends".
Anyway, I told myself to not jump to assumptions and that maybe he was just being friendly. I got to my car later after my shift and He had texted me "Here's my number HONEY" .. hmmmm.. ok, so I told him I was only looking for friendship. Today, he texted and asked in broken english, to explain my text from yesterday. ... We were busy tonight and no time for texting. I did my best to keep my head above water with tables. ...
He came up to me and asked if I was coming to his house later... ahhh, "no" I said, "I'm going home". I managed to slip out without seeing him, but he texted to see what I was going to do. We texted back and forth for a few min until he asked when He was going to get to take me to dinner???? ok so he hasn't got the point through translation of Espanol and English and the fact that Stephanie has been isolated in a bubble for 4 years now. ...
I hurriedly texted my Guatemala friend to find out how to tell a guy I didn't want a boyfriend and only wanted a friend. I forwarded it to mr. steakhouse cook, and he replied Vamos something... apparently what he wrote was "let's try it"... no no no bueno. I was going to say no gracias, but roomie said no need to be nice, "Just say NO". So i did and he replied, "ok". And that was that.. tomorrow will hopefully be fine behind the line... sigh!!
The long and short of the rest of the month is: God is good. I am hopeful of the future and anticipate signs and wonders in the name of Jesus in my life. :) Surely His goodness and Mercy are following me these days in my life. Mrs E. gave me a counseling session on life, money and marriage basically. God rocked my heart two Tuesdays ago after we talked. I cried for 2 hours belly sobs in the pr. ... wow. Something happened (obviously right!) that night and has stayed changed in me since. Can't put a finger on it but I know this: God unearthed hidden pain that is still unidentifiable, and in the process a resounding understanding of His Goodness surrounded me and still does.
Though it was painful, I acknowledged and confessed with my mouth "Yes, to whatever you are doing Lord", and "God you are good". It was a painful, really sweet, surrender moment. I was limp with exhaustion and surrendered in laying all down. With a yes in my heart, I think something in me died that day, and it needed to die hard. :) So be it. Good stuff. From death comes life. I sense that life has begun. Tuesday (almost 2 weeks ago), things came to a head- a cross roads of sorts- and since that moment I feel like the ball has started rolling.... What ball? and Unto what exactly???
Dunno. But what I do know is that it is good. I have a feeling that come June/July some really cool things are going to be happening.. :) Poland And Ukraine in July is an answer to prayer. When I asked God 3 months ago where should I go what should I do, I heard Him say "wait for 6 months". 6 months happens to be June/July... So, I have found freedom in the past few weeks with the marriage thing and laying down interest, along with laying down lies I had agreed with. God is moving quickly. 2 prayers answered since Mrs E. Well, enough said for now.. :) Grace, peace and joy to your heart.
I bless the Lord for taking all of me and fixing my broken life. Muchos Gracias Jesus! ps. God has uncovered how I have become selfish in the areas of finances meaning- I have been on the receiving end for awhile now and it's time I give sacrificially again. So I have been :) Give much, love much, grow much... Seek first His Kingdom. It will know no end. The flowers fade and the grass withers away but the Word of the Lord and His Kingdom endure forever.
Queen
Monday, February 14, 2011
Valentine
Went to a strip club today for the first time in my life. It won't be the last I'm pretty sure. If you know me, you know why I went... to love girls. Shady Lady Strip Club, open till 3am, 7days a week, 365 days a year. No windows, for several reasons, and dark. I was tripping over stools cause I couldn't see in the dim lighting. Avoiding looking over at the pole area, I followed Katie and Lynn to the bar. We introduced ourselves to Joe, I think he was the manager/bar tender. We gave him a bag of cookies and told him we had some gifts for the girls for working so hard. He said yeah, sure. So we handed out some beautiful white roses and small goodie bags to several precious girls. Outfits weren't much different than what you would see at a pool. Fancy underwear basically, that glowed in the black lights.
I did my best to not look around much. It wasn't that busy, 1 girl on the pole, a couple around the area talking to or attending to men. I caught painful glimpses of the acts. We met Heather, Ashley, Gretchen, Caitlyn, Debbie, and several others, but I forget their names. Me and my two other team members sat down to pray and wait for more girls to give gifts to. There was a juke box behind me that the girls put songs on for themselves to dance to. There were lots of little circle tables and empty chairs. Near the pole area there were couches and two older men with ladies. There was a black guy with dreads closest to us watching the girl dancing.
Ashley appeared behind the curtain behind me. I thought it was a wall, not a curtain.. I wonder what is in the other rooms of this place... Food orders were being taken to the back somewhere... Joe gave us free soda in small glasses with two little black straws. Thank you Joe, we said. The girls were happy to receive flowers and gifts, some more receptive to talking with us than others. Everyone knew we were Christians, I'm pretty sure. Several of them said, "we know you are church people" Besides my white glowing shirt, I'm sure we stood out their. Our little lights were shining in the darkness.
I used the tiny restroom under the blue neon light that said "ladies". Walked passed a older middle aged guy, maybe 60ish?? He looked at me and I kept walking. There were a total of 4 guys with a couple women around them, and i saw a girl in an area by herself on my way out of bathroom... Katie used restroom and ended up meeting Heather in there and they prayed. Heather has 2 toddlers. Ashley came out and asked if we'd be there awhile to talk. She was going to get ready and then would come out and sit with us. She was super bubbly and chatty. She said, "you church girls go to strip clubs, you guys are great!" We waited for her to go finish getting ready but decided to leave after 15-20min. We thanked Joe and said goodbye to Heather and made our way out into the daylight.
My eyes caught on a dusty display case with hats, t-shirts and ONESIEs in blue and pink with Shady Lady embroidered on them...
It was heavy in there. At first I thought, oh this isn't that bad.. then I saw a lap dance for a brief second. Yikes. So broken, and empty.
I dropped Lynn and Katie off and came back home to take a nap. I was tired from getting up at 12:45pm. Early for a night girl who normally gets to bed around 7 and up at 3pm. Anyway, I dreamed.
I dreamed we went to car and then got in and prayed, which we did do in real life. Then I went in with Lynn or someone else to give the girls more flowers, cause I found a potted flower in my car and some loose stem gerber daisys. They were wilting and in need of water. When I went in there were way more people and there were guys eating with their girlfriends. I gave one couple some flowers, the guy spoke to me asking for a flower. .. Over at the bar area there were some of the girls we had already met and some other girls. One really young girl with white t-shirt and cut off jean shorts. She was blonde and a white girl about 10 or 12 yrs old....(I grabbed my oatmeal from the fridge that i had made this morning for breakfast but hadn't finished- I think that's why I went back in, to grab the oatmeal I forgot??) Girls crowded around as we laid the flowers on the counter to give them. I told them they needed water. They said "you girls are so sweet..." and different little comments like that. On our real life visit I saw only white girls. In my dream there were black and white girls. On the way out I saw behind the curtain and the mirror area to see plush couches, beds and nice carpet. That's where the food was being ordered and it was one really big open spacious room with the sides lined with a couch area and the other side with comfy beds. Two tall black girls, who might have been trans, said we were so sweet and nice. The one hugged me. In the parking lot and side walk there were girls everywhere, just waking up, coming to get ready for the night etc... one girl passed me and I asked her kindly, "are you sleepy" she said yeah. She said that she was going to check out cars in the parking lot to see if the guys were married or not?? not sure how she would determine that from looking at their cars but??... I woke up to a bark and the car garage door opening. The feeling of seeing all those girls and talking with them, was pretty real. I feel like we really did talk with them. ... Jesus, flood their hearts with light and open their eyes to see the worth, the value and the beauty of Jesus. For them to Love the Lord with all their heart soul mind and strength and to love themselves as He loves them. To know their worth, value and beauty cant' be bought. They are precious in His sight. .. Jesus give them your love tonight.
I did my best to not look around much. It wasn't that busy, 1 girl on the pole, a couple around the area talking to or attending to men. I caught painful glimpses of the acts. We met Heather, Ashley, Gretchen, Caitlyn, Debbie, and several others, but I forget their names. Me and my two other team members sat down to pray and wait for more girls to give gifts to. There was a juke box behind me that the girls put songs on for themselves to dance to. There were lots of little circle tables and empty chairs. Near the pole area there were couches and two older men with ladies. There was a black guy with dreads closest to us watching the girl dancing.
Ashley appeared behind the curtain behind me. I thought it was a wall, not a curtain.. I wonder what is in the other rooms of this place... Food orders were being taken to the back somewhere... Joe gave us free soda in small glasses with two little black straws. Thank you Joe, we said. The girls were happy to receive flowers and gifts, some more receptive to talking with us than others. Everyone knew we were Christians, I'm pretty sure. Several of them said, "we know you are church people" Besides my white glowing shirt, I'm sure we stood out their. Our little lights were shining in the darkness.
I used the tiny restroom under the blue neon light that said "ladies". Walked passed a older middle aged guy, maybe 60ish?? He looked at me and I kept walking. There were a total of 4 guys with a couple women around them, and i saw a girl in an area by herself on my way out of bathroom... Katie used restroom and ended up meeting Heather in there and they prayed. Heather has 2 toddlers. Ashley came out and asked if we'd be there awhile to talk. She was going to get ready and then would come out and sit with us. She was super bubbly and chatty. She said, "you church girls go to strip clubs, you guys are great!" We waited for her to go finish getting ready but decided to leave after 15-20min. We thanked Joe and said goodbye to Heather and made our way out into the daylight.
My eyes caught on a dusty display case with hats, t-shirts and ONESIEs in blue and pink with Shady Lady embroidered on them...
It was heavy in there. At first I thought, oh this isn't that bad.. then I saw a lap dance for a brief second. Yikes. So broken, and empty.
I dropped Lynn and Katie off and came back home to take a nap. I was tired from getting up at 12:45pm. Early for a night girl who normally gets to bed around 7 and up at 3pm. Anyway, I dreamed.
I dreamed we went to car and then got in and prayed, which we did do in real life. Then I went in with Lynn or someone else to give the girls more flowers, cause I found a potted flower in my car and some loose stem gerber daisys. They were wilting and in need of water. When I went in there were way more people and there were guys eating with their girlfriends. I gave one couple some flowers, the guy spoke to me asking for a flower. .. Over at the bar area there were some of the girls we had already met and some other girls. One really young girl with white t-shirt and cut off jean shorts. She was blonde and a white girl about 10 or 12 yrs old....(I grabbed my oatmeal from the fridge that i had made this morning for breakfast but hadn't finished- I think that's why I went back in, to grab the oatmeal I forgot??) Girls crowded around as we laid the flowers on the counter to give them. I told them they needed water. They said "you girls are so sweet..." and different little comments like that. On our real life visit I saw only white girls. In my dream there were black and white girls. On the way out I saw behind the curtain and the mirror area to see plush couches, beds and nice carpet. That's where the food was being ordered and it was one really big open spacious room with the sides lined with a couch area and the other side with comfy beds. Two tall black girls, who might have been trans, said we were so sweet and nice. The one hugged me. In the parking lot and side walk there were girls everywhere, just waking up, coming to get ready for the night etc... one girl passed me and I asked her kindly, "are you sleepy" she said yeah. She said that she was going to check out cars in the parking lot to see if the guys were married or not?? not sure how she would determine that from looking at their cars but??... I woke up to a bark and the car garage door opening. The feeling of seeing all those girls and talking with them, was pretty real. I feel like we really did talk with them. ... Jesus, flood their hearts with light and open their eyes to see the worth, the value and the beauty of Jesus. For them to Love the Lord with all their heart soul mind and strength and to love themselves as He loves them. To know their worth, value and beauty cant' be bought. They are precious in His sight. .. Jesus give them your love tonight.
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